To my friend, Juan Sanchez
Although I had only known you for 1-1 ½ years, its like we grew up together, and even though you have passed away, you have added something to my life that I will never forget, feelings that are unexplainable. Funny, nice, and an all around good guy, you gave me memories I will cherish forever. Working on cars, the drunk nights, the good times, everything I do will remind me of the times we had together. Im so confused right now because I have never had a loss close 2 me b4, you will be the first funeral ill b attending, but hopefully my last one, but with life there is also death so the outcome is inevitable. Im so overcome with emotions right now and I dont know what to think, Im mad, mad at myself for not being there to see you b4 your last breath, im mad, mad at others and trying to find a person to blame for this tragedy. Im mad at you also, because now one of my closest friends will not be here, and I know its not your fault, I wanted to grow up with you, I wanted to laugh more, I wanted more moments. Im sad that you are now gone and that I will not b able to make memories with you anymore. I remember the little things between me and you. Like the time when we were at the creek with the group, and we tried to make a bridge to cross the creek, and how when we were hanging out there u made funny sound effects for everything you did even if it was just throwing a rock in the creek. The drunk nights where you ended up passed out on the beer pong table, that was hilarious. And when I got my new phone and told people to choose ringtones you chose "Island in the sun" by Weezer, and when I asked you why you chose it you gave me a simple answer "cuz its good" and that was the only explanation I needed from you because you were never afraid to show what you liked and disliked. This was not supposed to happen like this, I was supposed 2 spend another good 50 years with you and the rest of the crew. And this happened in what was supposed 2 b the greatest week of my life because we were headed to the beach and it was an escape for our problems, to not have a care in the world, and you were supposed 2 come up and join us later in the week with Ronnie. When I left, you even called me at 12:14 am that night, I still have it on my phone and that was also the last time I spoke to you, you asked me if I was excited and I responded with a hell yea, and you wished me a good time, and I wished you a good time in whitewater rafting, who knew that you were gonna leave us the next day, if I knew I woulda said so many more things like how I appreciated the call and that you were like a brother to me. I remember the phone call from francisco where he said that you were not going to make it I was devastated, but at the same time I did not want to come back because this was going to be my only escape from my life, I wanted to wake up the next day like it was a dream, and no matter how much I tried to ignore it, even the littlest things reminded me of you, even riding in khoa's car made me tear up because you spent so much time working on it, seeing the beach and you not being there hurt also, while i was at the beach you were in the hospital struggling to hold on for life. And while I was shopping at the stores their I was looking at the mugs and I saw your name on one of them and I almost broke down, but I had to try and keep a str8 face because I had to keep it together not only for myself but also everyone else, Matt, Kris, Won, Alex, Khoa, and Bao, because I did not want them to think about it. But this is life, and now im back home early, about to go to your viewing and then tomorrow at ur burial. We were asked to wear all white at the funeral because you are not in darkness but you are just resting, and I hope this is true that you will somehow come back into our lives. You were taken from us at the ripe age of 21, you had so much more to live. And although you may not be able to read this, know that I loved you like a brother, and that everything I do will remind me of you, Friends are an integral part of your life, but every friend you have must live life at their own pace. When the time comes & they must leave you, there is no need to grieve over their parting from your life. It is the very essence of life that it should be so. But it hurts nonetheless and we grieve nonetheless, but we hold them in our hearts forever. Always cherish the joy, laughter, memories and love that they have brought into your lives. Always remember them with a warm smile for what they have given
Your Brother,
David Pham
P.S. I really do hope there is an afterlife, and that you can have your Island in the sun
